The Future Toilet: Coming to a bathroom near you?

Monday, August 20th, 2007

For all those perverse souls who have wondered about the facilities on the Starship Enterprise, or are curious about the physiology of a Time Lord, well, this post is for you.

We’re excited to be able to put you out of your misery and show you what the Future Toilet actually looks like (without venturing into all those secret rooms in The TARDIS). But, to be honest with you, the loo of the future turns out to be surprisingly familiar.

Yes, the Future Toilet is now being manufactured. Designed to appeal chiefly to the male love of gadgets, it includes a self-lowering seat and lid that operates with the flush and a lever so that the guys don’t have to upset their delicate dispositions by actually putting their hands anywhere near the business end when they need to raise it again.

Hint: that little spiky brush that is tucked away in a corner under the cistern. That’s not an ornament, boys, and it’s not a design feature. Same goes for all the pretty-coloured bottles of cleaning fluid dotted around. Oh yes and, now we think of it, washing your hands on the way out isn’t such a bad idea, either…

We cannot help but admit that this is bound to solve a lot of arguments. Now, if the manufacturers could just come up with a self-cleaning version, that’s the divorce rated lowered by about ten per cent…

We’re really hoping that one of our partners will be offering this – if so we’ll make sure we get it up on the site as quickly as possible.

In the meantime, to buy one you should contact the manufacturers. (Sorry we can’t link more directly; unfortunately it’s one of those unwieldy Flash sites that cripples proper linking. Also, you will need to turn the volume right down if viewing at work.)

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